No matter it is a small town or a big modern city, the woman is not safe anywhere in our country. The society just blames women’s lifestyle and clothing and hold her to blame for everything. But they don’t understand that it’s not women’s fault, the mentality of the society regarding females should be changed. Do you think women are responsible for all of this?
However, among all these, a cab driver Sahil Tomar has a completely different thinking on women. Sahil came to Delhi in search of the job, and he shared his opinion with us about women, after reading his post we are sure you will agree with his opinion. Sahil Tomar says it is we who must change ourselves women should not change. Yes, we agree with Tomar.
Sahil came to Delhi for a job, he reveals about his experience as for how he used to feel awkward when he used to get into an argument with the girls in short clothes or the outspoken Delhi girls. At this time he realized that it’s his mentality which is at fault, not the women.
He had come to Delhi in search of a good job; he shares his experience as to how he used to feel very awkward to face outspoken Delhi girls or the ones with short clothes. It is that time that he realized that his mentality was wrong.
Sahil Tomar wrote a letter on Women and Rape, and it is going viral on the Internet.
Here is the letter you must read.
My dear brothers and sisters,
I am just a cab driver who neither has the education nor the life experience to preach or give lessons to anyone. But I do have a message, which I wish to send across through this letter.
I came to Delhi almost a decade ago with dreams of improving my life. I was then a 22-year-old boy who had never stepped out of his village in Uttar Pradesh’s Faizabad district. My father, who was a farmer and a seasonal laborer, always stressed the importance of education and toiled hard to give the best possible opportunities to my three siblings and me.
But, I was never good at studies. I failed my exams several times and repeated a few classes before I somehow managed to pass my class 10 board exams. After that, I tried my hand at several things — farming, mason work, sitting idle and ogling at women in the village.
I was 20-years-old when I learned to drive, and my father finally sent me to Delhi to find a job. Delhi, however, was not the city of my dreams. People would just walk past me and not notice me at all. From early morning to late night, women and men roamed around without any inhibitions.
When I started driving in Delhi, I used to feel offended by how outspoken women in the city were. They would shout at me for missing a turn, and argue for change and call me tum and tu. I used to consider them ill-mannered and resent how their behavior was in total contrast to how things were back in my village. There, a boy and a girl still cannot walk together and women do not dare remove their ghunghat, let alone boss men around.
I was scandalized and was hit by a huge culture shock in Delhi. Getting into fights with a man is different, but getting belittled by a woman seemed insulting. Sometimes during late-night pickups, female passengers wearing short clothes would get in my car and sit comfortably on the front seat. It used to make me uncomfortable.
But that was the old me. As I grew in the city and gained some maturity, I gradually became broad minded. You get used to it also. Most importantly, I realized it’s not the women who need to change. It’s me who had to. I had to let go of my shallow thinking.
I found a trick to adjust to this modern environment that I would like to share with my brothers. Think of it this way – would you feel awkward if a man sat comfortably on the front seat and talked to you? Would you raise an eyebrow seeing a man smoke or him being in minimal clothes? No. So, why make such a big issue if a woman does the same things? A woman is as normal as a man.
The situation has gotten worse for us ever since a cab driver raped a female passenger sometime at the end of 2014. I do not disagree that some drivers who have just come from villages and have not seen modernity would get excited and do gandi harkat (bad things) with women. But I plead, not every driver is the same as that culprit. I am not that type, for sure.
I want to tell my fellow cab drivers that our job is not only about dropping people to their destination and earning money. Each time we get a new booking from a customer, that person – be it a man or woman – signs an unwritten pact of safety and security with us. And we must be fully conscious of this and behave accordingly to set the right example. We have to win the faith of our passengers, especially the women who are so scared of us these days that they click pictures of our car and ourselves to share with their families for safety purposes.
As drivers, we must behave like ‘guardians’ of the roads – dropping a woman to her house or where ever she is headed to. Every journey that we safely complete is a badge of honor that we take back home to our families with a smile.